Nepal Lessons

I’ve travelled all over Nepal and have some fond – or, rather, interesting – memories that stand out. Some trips were personal, but most of my adventures in Nepal were official trips.

The road trips were the most educational part of my time in Nepal. I saw gorgeous views of lush green hills framed by the Himalayas. Beautiful birds and flowers. I also saw buses packed with people on the roof and abandoned trucks stuck in mud. I have done my personal business in places I would rather forget, and slept in beds that discouraged long-term stays.

During these road trips, my culinary experiences were usually pretty bland. Daal bhat or chow mein. After a week on the road and I never wanted to see rice or noodles again. But once in a while I would stumble upon something good. One time we stopped at a ramshackle tea house on the side of the road. We had a snack whose name I can’t spell and whose ingredients I can’t remember.  Sadly, I am resigned that I will never find that tasty treat again.

Speaking of food, while staying at “the best” hotel in Dhangadhi, it was too hot to leave my air conditioned room (I justified my laziness by telling myself that a hotel room with air conditioning was so rare, that I should enjoy it as much as possible), so I decided to order room service. The menu included hamburger, cheeseburger, chicken burger, etc. In a moment of foolish curiosity to see what a burger in a Hindu country might be (and an unwillingness to endure yet another daal bhat meal), I ordered a cheeseburger.  What arrived was two slices of bread… with a piece of cheese in between. Lesson learned.

Sometimes these trips taught me another kind of lesson. While in Jiri, I happened upon a funeral procession. A group of people was carrying a blanket-wrapped body, accompanied by musicians playing a melody that was difficult to discern, down to the river where they would set the pyre on fire. I asked another spectator how the person died and she told me he had been electrocuted. Another person had died the day before by drowning in the same river in which his body had been burned, and to which this stranger was being carried. Life is easily lost here.  Things I take for granted in America can kill you here. Faulty wiring, losing your balance while washing your clothes in the river, even diarrhea can be deadly.

It’s been an adventure. I can’t say that I enjoyed living in Kathmandu, but I’ve enjoyed exploring the country and having incredible experiences. I’m packing out soon and going on home leave, so I may not update this for a while.

See you in Kabul!

Spinster Diplomacy

As my time in Nepal comes to an end, I've been thinking about the work I've done here and forcing myself to honestly consider whether it's made a difference. While I can't boast about helping the government of Nepal get their act together (the political parties were unable to reach a deal on a new constitution and now the government has dissolved), I do think I've been able to make a small difference in how Nepalis regard America.

One of the controversial parts of public diplomacy work is that it's difficult to measure success. I think one measurement is the willingness of the host country to listen to what we have to say. Over time, our outreach efforts help us build credibility and develop an environment in which the public listens to us when we have something to say, rather than dismissing our message as "foreign interference." Of course, this is much easier to do in a country that is already favorably disposed to America.

I've travelled all over Nepal, engaged with thousands of Nepalis, and established friendships with a handful. While issuing press releases and posting messages on social media reach a large number of people (and seeing my words quoted in a newspaper never gets old), it has been the personal connections that I think have had the greatest impact. Swapping music with teenagers, sharing stories about my childhood at an American Corner, nominating a talented young woman for a prestigious exchange program to the States. These are what I'll remember most about my contributions in Nepal.

Most recently I met a young woman who works for an organization that assists survivors of human trafficking or domestic abuse. We started talking about the customs in that part of the country and what the expectations are for women of her age, religion, caste, etc. After listening to her for a while, I casually mentioned that I have never been married. She considered this for a moment and then her face lit up. "Oh, I'm so happy that I met you!" I don't think she had ever met a women who never married (certainly not one of my age) and to see a real-life example was shocking. She said so many girls are pressured to marry at a very young age, but she wants to get an education, pursue a career in social service, and continue living with and caring for her parents. I think she will fulfill that goal. 

Better Things to Do

I'm not sure if it's because we're in primary season or because of the latest round of conjecture about Secretary Clinton's future, but I'm hearing a lot about the lack of women in elected positions in government. One reason that is often proposed is that politics remains a boys club where women are not welcome. I'm not sure I agree; I think the opposite is true. Based on my own unscientific, anectodal research, I think women are generally repulsed by politics. I know many intelligent, politically aware women who, when asked if they would ever consider running for office, said, "Hell no!" They have better things to do.

I'd welcome your thoughts on this, especially from the intelligent, politically aware women out there.

No Mas

This is an open letter to all Nepalis (specifically, those who have my contact info),

Do not ask me to help you / your brother / your boss / your friend get a visa. I have no authority to issue visas and it is inappropriate for me to involve myself in consular decisions. Similarly, do not ask my staff to help you  / your brother / your boss / your friend get a visa.

If you / your brother / your boss / your friend applies for a visa and is rejected, do not send me a text message late at night telling me how unfair it is. There is nothing I can do about it and such a text message will only piss me off. You / your brother / your boss / your friend is not the first person to be upset about not getting a visa so do not expect special treatment from me.

I feel better now.